Friday, May 14, 2010

Lovin' the chemo

Well, I am surviving this round of chemo symptoms. My hands and feet hurt worse than yesterday but I only barfed once today....so far. There is an angel out there who sent me electric hand and feet warmers. I put the feet warmers on and it is like instant relief and the hand warmers sit on either side of my thighs so I can type and warm, type and warm again. Great little system I've got going on here! I am incapable of writing thank you cards....mostly because of my hands and partially because it brings too many emotions to the surface. Never mind the fact that it would take me till the year 3000 to get them all written. But in most cases I am at least able to thank everyone for their kindness and generosity in person. So, how do you thank a secret angel? Hmmm. I am so amazed at how God has blessed me through all of you!

Quick up date...Papa Rich will be going through more tests this week and next. The first lab test/biopsy done on questionable cancer cells/tumor cells came back inconclusive. Right now they are calling him a stage 3a which gives him better odds at fighting this. I believe that miracles are already happening in his crazy old body! Love you Rich! More prayers and love coming your way!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

chemo 11 continued!

Chemo was on for yesterday. Feeling yucky today but will gt though. I don't go back till the 2nd of June...hopefully that will bring my platelets up a bit. They were down to 63......slightly low huh? My finger hurt and I am very tired and nauseated. I am going to nap now. Later!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

chemo or not to chemo?

I believe I will have chemo tomorrow....we will see. I have my brain wrapped around it at this point and I am sure I will be disappointed if I don't. Staying on track is so important to me right now even if I am truly tired of dealing with chemo symptoms. The only reason I would not have chemo is if my platelets are too low and at this point I think they are OK. It's in my gut I tell you!

It is the snow storm that is going to send me to a padded room. My fingers are numb at the tips and my hands are very reactive to the cold......any cold for that matter. The storm is only pissing off my fingers, just so ya know! I know.....get out the heating pad and quit your whining! I'm tyring....I really am. I will keep you posted! Love out to you all!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happpy Mothers day!

There is always that nagging thought in the back of my measly brain wondering if I am going to be around for the next....in this case, Mothers Day. It makes for an interesting day. I am finding myself taking in everything around me. Watching how others interact, smile, laugh. Watching other mommies hugging their children was especially special to me, and how they looked up at their mommies with toothless grins and pride. What more can one ask for? I, personally, have been blessed with wonderful girls. I am so proud of their accomplishment it can bring me to tears. I truly believe that being a Mom is the best thing in the world!

On this day I am in need for prayer for my own mother. Pray for strength for what she is enduring. She is not only dealing with the uncertainty of a daughter and her cancer, but recently has been delivered yet another blow. Her wonderful husband and friend has been diagnosed with lung and throat cancer. They are now beginning their own battle at home. Upon hearing this news I have come to the realization that it may actually be harder on the loved ones around. I have to say, I found more sadness in knowing what they are about to go through than the reality of what I am dealing with. Please pray for healing....for both of them.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Thank you!

Feelin' so good today! Do I really have cancer? hmmm.....Well, fingers are still acting up although bearable......it is annoying and the wind rips up my nose. What is with this wind anyway? If I wanted to live in Cheyenne I would move there.

I have to take yet another sappy moment.......It was a very difficult chemo session. However, every time I come out of hiding I seem to constantly get smacked in the face with huge amounts of encouragement, love and support! I am aware that many people doubted I would live past 6 months. Just so you know...it has been six months! Something to celebrate! And you know why I am doing so well? Because love heals! I am probably the luckiest person on the face of the earth. I know that sounds crazy considering I have massive tumors on my liver, but think about it!I have the best husband(sorry guys, but I do), I have the greatest kids, worlds cutest dog and cat and by far the most loving friends!......oh ya, and God is on my side! Thank you all for lifting me up and caring for me when I am knocked down by chemo and life itself. Love goes out to you!

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Mother knows best....

Remember that saying? Sometimes it is actually true......Because my hands hurt soooooo very bad this session, John said, "I am going to Walmart to get you a heating pad for your hands." Ok. My mom had suggested that when she was here in December........I just couldn't justify spending money on a stupid heating pad. I am pretty cheap when it comes to things like this. Thank God John thought it was important! I am able to warm them under the computer and then actually type a few sentences. Pretty cool, I think. Ok mom....that's enough. If you pull on your ear lobe your ego-air will release and your head will shrink back to normal.....:) Glad I have a slew of loved ones looking out for my best interest.......half the time I don't even know what I need. It's the truth. Nausea has subsided to the point that I am looking forward to dinner. I have found that I can heat up my new red mittens under the pad and actually walk all the way to the bathroom with little hand pain. Yay!

short but sweet

Keeping this one short since i have to type with the back of my right thumb nail. Fingers hurt really bad, making everything challenging. I continue to have quite a bit nausea and i am vomitting more this time. Nothing tastes good.....can't cover up metal shavings of the mouth! My feet hurt pretty bad too. I just have to remind myself that it is working, therefore well worth it. Thumb nail is calling it quits....later.